Sadly, I wasn’t able to go to BlogHer this year. I was able to purchase my tickets at a great price when they were released, and the my little heart broke as I had to sell it. My first BlogHer was 3 years ago in California. I was all form of nervous and excited at the same time. I would know a few bloggers there that I made personal relationships with from the blogging community, but that was it.
For the last few days, I’ve seen a lot of negative posts talking about other bloggers from BlogHer. It’s honestly just really pissing me off – I’m totally just annoyed from seeing what people are talking about from BlogHer. Not from the speakers or anything like that, but from other Bloggers and how “they were treated”. I’ve read the following:
3. I got a lot of cold shoulders
4. I felt like I was in high school all over again
5. Just rinse and repeat these sayings in different ways.
6. I felt like an outsider that couldn’t get into the group of “cool kids”.
Guess what? You’re only doing it to your self. I know some people have social anxiety, and I feel bad that you have those innate feelings. Plus, I could only begin to imagine how you are putting yourself out there in a microcosm world of a couple of thousand bloggers of whom you don’t even know. That’s a totally different story. However, if you are distraught with social anxiety, maybe big blogging conferences shouldn’t be your first go to? There are tons of other blogging conferences out there in the world, and are much much smaller and have a more intimate setting that you can make connections with people on a different level.
For those that don’t have social anxiety and did all of this complaining, did you really go to BlogHer to make new friends and socialize? Did you go to learn something? Did you go to see the speakers? Did you go to meet brands and make amazing connections? Did you go to see all of the different celebrities there? There’s a lot to get caught up in, but it’s up to you to what you want to get out of the conference.
When I went to my first blogging conference, I knew I wanted to meet people. Fresh faces. New blogging input on life and family. So what did I do? I started saying Hi to everyone, and gave out hugs. People even made mention of it in the BlogHer group, and I had to make sure to catch up with a ton of other people to get my hugs too! Sometimes people didn’t hear me the first time, so I would say it again with a bigger smile. It can totally be off putting, I’m sure…I’m kind of force of happiness and cargo shorts running around. I ran across people in the hallways and corridors at all different times of the day. In fact, I came across a group of ladies (of about 20) they were popping some bubbly and sharing some yummy libations. I was like, “Heeeeeyyyy!” Did a little shake, and they screamed for me to come over and cheered me with a glass of bubbly in handing. They made me a part of their circle, and we chatted for a few hours while sharing tons of laughs and horrible dance moves with no music on.
The next year, I basically did the same exact thing. With the exception that I decided to take a ton of random selfies with everyone. I didn’t care if I knew you or not, and guess what? Everyone totally loved it. They threw on their happy party face and ended with a big ol’ sweaty hug from dancing.
Here’s why I take offense to you complaining: You’re quite possibly talking about my friends. My sisters. My brothers. My fellow bloggers. It’s rude, insulting, and I don’t think you are looking at life through the eyes of other people.
No offense, but if I was there…I would have made plans with lots of other bloggers with trying to have breakfast, lunch, or dinner with them. I would totally want to know what my other amazing blogging friends are doing so I can pull out of my color coded schedule to see if we can squeeze in time to chit chat and catch up on life. Other bloggers are doing the same exact thing that I would have been doing. We crave the intimate time spent with each other before we got lost in the sea of bloggers craving attention and trying to stand out. (By the way, complete side note! When I saw you complaining about how other bloggers made you feel, and I saw tons of responses from other bloggers to support and encourage you…I saw you make an excuse or two for why you couldn’t meet up.)
Just like my siblings, whom of which I don’t always get along with, it’s the same way with my bloggy friends. We don’t always see eye to eye, but they do know that I’m totally going to be honest with them and love them regardless. However, I won’t talk badly about them. They are who they are as people, and have to accept that fact. All of my friends, Blogging and Non-Blogging, know that I am who I am. I try to be the best person I am, and I don’t make excuses for who I am. If you can’t find anyone to connect with or accept who you are, why are you wasting so much energy for that? Dust if off and move on to the next. Just stay who you are, even if you have the R.B.F. (Resting Bitch Face) problem. Some women with R.B.F. have become some of my best and fabulous friends. And honestly, I have R.B.F. once in a while, and don’t even mean to. It just happens when I get deep in thought, or if a squirrel happens.
The next time you want to complain about people, realize what you’re doing. Realize what you’re saying. Realize how you are acting. Just because you’re at a huge conference, it doesn’t equate that you’re going to make amazing friendships and bonds…unless you sincerely want to get to know someone and break down that wall to truly make that connection.
Oh!! One more thing before I go. Everyone being starstruck and making a bee line with cutting people and stuff like that to meet these yummy famous people: Get over it. IF I was there in the presence of Freddy Prinze, Jr…you would be road kill. I’m totally just being honest here. That man is just some sort of handsome and sexiness wrapped into to a cute little smile that strikes me in the heart.